We're young. And we take advantage of the people who love us, especially our family. We always think "Oh they're family, they will always be here" but well that's not how it works. You'll just be sitting  home one day, and then you'll get a call. I got it from my mom, and she told me to get ready. And then, everything else will just happen so quickly. The next thing you know, you'll be standing infront of a lifeless body, thinking to yourself "Why didn't I appreciate him when he was around?" Before you know it, the tears roll start rolling down your cheeks, and mucus flowing down your nose. And your head hurts and you'll feel numb. The truth is, you don't feel sad because someone has passed on, you feel the pain because you're filled with regret. Regret for not spending enough time with him, regret for always putting your friends before your own blood. And regret for knowing that sooner or later, all the others will slowly start dissapearing too. You see the closer relatives moaning, "My brother, My brother, why did you leave me?" And you'll start to think, "How if it was my brother? Or my mom? Or my dad?" Sooner or later, the other kids, younger than you, start coming. And their tears and screams, is what really breaks you.

Isn't it ironic? How it takes a sad event, like a funeral, to get the whole family together? Things like that, change you. You'll start appreciating your loved ones more. You'll start being nicer to people. And you'll start understanding things better.

Somebody, anybody, please take care of my grandmother tomorrow. I doubt she's going to be fine.

25th May 2012

Rest In Peace, Grandpa Julian. You really fought with this sickness till the very end. We're going to miss you dearly. I'm so sorry I can't be there tomorrow.

Maybe if you stop taking everything so seriously, you'll be happier.

Trust me, it'll work.

I'm sorry. I know there's just too many of them.

"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to"

I'm so excited to drink orange juice in tiny plastic cups on the plane HAHA

OH YAY SEMESTER 1 IS OVER!
Didn't do much today in school today. CCA/House Leaders investiture didn't go as bad as I pictured it to be. "You must be a good girl, and be more responsible okay?" Haha, Mrs LHP is such an encouraging teacher. Looks like I can't skip CCA anymore, but hopefully I'll reach the required 75% of attendance by the end of the year! MIB 3 with Kelly, Ching, Justina and Evelyn turned out to be pretty fun. Our plan to "bond and become closer" worked quite well! Haha you guys should've heard Justina's reactions when all the aliens appeared. Got frolick before going back to Plaza Sing just to waste some time, and we ended up playing Hide&Seek in Spotlight before heading home. Haha thanks guys, I had a great day with y'all.
Let's hope my plans for tomorrow and Saturday will work out well.

Today, or probably tomorrow, will be the start of my "Start Studying/Reading More/Watching More Documentaries So You'll Make It In Life" Plan. Started thinking about what Mr. Wu told me on Thursday, about how it's not good to be too competitive as it'll just add redundant stress and make me more angry with myself. But I don't do it in the "I want to kill all of you guys so I'll make it to the top" way. It's more of a "I just want to be as good as you guys" kind of way. HAHA but it still isn't really very good.
Photo taking today was actually quite okay. And the rest of the time was spent going through corrections, filing and sitting in circles on the floor talking about Perth, Haha. And I hope you guys liked my coffee chocolate cupcakes, although they were a little burnt :( Skipped CCA photo taking for Macdonalds' with Vidhya, Angela, Franky and Pei Shyuen. Is it just me, or are apple pies really hard to eat?

Last 3 days of school for the semester. Let's not waste it being an over-thinking sensitive child okay?

Yes, from now onwards, Sunday's going to be my favourite day. I love how it usually starts off with mass with Sheriann and Cherlyn. And breakfast with the rest at R.K. where the Muslim lady would always ask us to "Faster eat, rushing right?" Because many many weeks ago, we told her to hurry serve us our pratas or we won't make it back in time for class. And she has never forgotten the 6 of us ever since. Rushing up the hill to make it back by 11 so we wouldn't have to stack chairs after lesson end, and listening to our catechist talk for an hour or so before getting separated into our classes. Taking the bus down to Dessert Bowl/Macs/Nex after class, and going home to find the entire family still sleeping, and having an hour or two to myself. Getting ready for Taekwondo class, and then deciding not to go if C doesn't go. And using the time to blog about how my Sunday went, when nobody actually cares. HAHAHA.

Same thing happens, EVERY. SINGLE. WEEK.
But for some reason, I like it. A lot.

"The only thing that could spoil a day was people. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself"

Spent the whole day behind my room door sleeping, reading, and watching ANTM. This is as interesting as my life can get on a Saturday when nobody's at home.

Things I need to do today night/tomorrow:

1) Find all my worksheets and file them before teachers give me their death stares on Monday.

2) Book BBQ pit and plan everything

3) Start buying toiletries/polaroid films for Perth

4) Continue learning the second half of Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy

5) Wash my school shoes (Wow, it's been 3 months)

6) Sort my thoughts out

Sorry, no pictures today. Blogger's giving me problems.


"Where are you planning to go with a 35?"
I don't know dad, I really don't.

I'll skip the whole part, where I rant about my SA1 results because I don't feel like it and I bet everyone's already tired of me complaining over and over again. To cut a long story short, This is not Os and this doesn't count for anything in the long run.
Dragon Boating today for SEP was really really fun, better than I expected it to be. Haha, most of the time was spent splashing water at people from other boats, and getting water poured on us for answering questions wrongly.
Perth in 9 days. Well, at least that's something to look forward to~

JUST WATCHED THE SEASON 7 FINALE OF HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER.

And guys, as much as I don't want to spoil it for y'all, I have to. Haha it's just too tempting.

Lily&Marshall's baby has the best name ever:
Marvin Waitforit Eriksen

And here's the best part...
ROBIN STINSON.
Yes my friends,
Robin Stinson.

EVERYTHING MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW HAHAHAHA

I was trying to sign into blogger a few minutes ago, but I wasn't able to. Then I realized I spelled my name as "Chairmaine". HAHA I'm getting from bad to worse. My mom took my phone away for the day because she needed to use the recorder or something. And I suddenly realized that she's going to continue doing that for the whole of Term 3 if I don't pass my Maths. Urgh.
Moving on..
Today, was by far, the most productive day I've had since the exams were over. Took 2 hours just to clean 2 drawers filled with old exam papers, books, notes, and files. Haha It's so neat now I don't even dare open my drawers. But it'll probably only be this way for a week or so, then it'll be messy again. Went for a good carrot cake lunch + ice cream @ Wendy's with Officer Pinto before she came over to watch insidious. And guys, if you ever need emotional support while watching horror shows, never call on Angela or I because we'll both be very unreliable. Most of the time was spent hiding behind pillows and talking about how we'll never get baby monitors, grandfather clocks, children, big houses, chandeliers, rocking horses, and puppets.  But it's a pretty good movie, with a pretty unexpected ending, SO GO WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T.
Probably getting results back tomorrow, but Twelfth Night's tomorrow too! Just hope it doesn't rain...

I've come to a point where I realize that I'm not good enough for you. And no matter how hard I try, I'll never be good enough for you. But it's okay, I love you too much as a friend anyways.

Hello to whoever who still reads this.
Today, everyone seemed to already have plans, or was busy with something else. Luckily Bronte was free and nice enough to follow me to CentrePoint to get my books. And in return, I followed her shopping to F21, HMV and H&M. And she's so retarded, she bought another The Wanted album just because she wanted a different sticker. And she told her mom and sister that I bought another album for her, and I think her family thinks I'm crazy now :'( Nonetheless, it was great fun going out with her after about 4 months? Krystle came over in the evening because we were suppose to go jogging but we ended up being lazy and just stayed at home. Haha, I seriously need to start exercising more (Confirmation's in 5 months & 25 days) Talking to Ching on Ebuddy now. HAHA I can't believe we still use that...
Things seem to be going pretty well right now. But good things don't last forever right?  

Avengers on Friday with Angela, Gaby, Kelly, Vidhya, and Tricia was good. It's been so long since we all went out together. And nothing much happened yesterday, except for breakfast + tuition with Ching. Mr Sany kept picking on her and I feel kinda bad because the only reason he did that was because I kept talking to her, Haha sorry :'( The usual happened today, 9am mass with the family but we couldn't go down for breakfast since it was raining and we were all too lazy. AND BRONTE CALLED ME A CARROT. (My parents applaud you for that btw, they thought it was actually quite funny) Mother's day Tea with my mom and aunt before heading to Town to get clothes for the wedding. Steamboat dinner with the Michaels' and basically that was all that happened today. My flu's back once again, and I feel like going for those flu jabs that would stop it for the next 5 years.

Too young to understand. Too young to judge. 

Everything makes perfect sense right now. All those bits of memories that I remember suddenly all link up together to form a perfect picture. But the problem is, there's still a piece or two missing. I understand why nobody ever told me, I know you guys knew I wouldn't understand. But it's okay, what's in the past is in the past right? 

OH YEAH SA1 IS OVER~
Please don't tell me the Math paper was easy because it wasn't. Or maybe it's just me, who's forever gonna be failing maths. How am I gonna find a job next time? Haha!
Visited my grandfather at TTSH. They didn't allow me in without a mask, so I had to wear a smelly smelly mask. Met Jacq for lunch, after so long :') It was pretty good + bad at the same time. Can't wait to turn 18, and then I'll start to understand everything better.
Oh, and before I forget, GOOD LUCK CHING SUEN FOR YOUR PHYSICS TOMORROW!

Oh no. Here we go again.

Just watched Happythankyoumoreplease. And as usual, Josh Radnor was so good. And if you guys haven't seen it yet, hurry go download it and watch it because it's such a great movie and Kate Mara is so gorgeous  so just keep staring at her. HAHA.

Screwed my Geog paper up today. How did I possibly see a meander as an oxbow lake? HOW HOW HOW. Anyways, I love all the mind maps I've been doing, because of all the colours Haha. But I really really hope they'll help me for Bio tomorrow :'( And I still don't understand Nutrition in Humans, somebody help me tomorrow morning please. Just 2 more papers, and I'm done but I already feel so tired and all I want to do is just read more Roald Dahl books, watch Animal Planet & HIMYM and just sleep sleep sleep~

There was no Cat class today because the teachers probably realized nobody would come since it's the exam period, so I just went for mass with Sheriann before heading for brunch with Jean. I guess it was quite enjoyable since she's pretty nice to talk to, and she was telling me about how my blog seems so sad. So I went home and re-read all my posts from this year, and compared them to the ones from last year. And yes, what she said was true, my blog seems more depressing now, and I don't even know why! Haha, I feel quite fine actually. So, from today, no more depressing posts (Unless when it's really necessary). And I love how Channel 5 is showing Harry Potter movies lately, it was The Half-Blood Prince today. You know if you really think about it, Tom Riddle was quite hot as a student. HAHA OKAY BYE.

Another day wasted. But at least I managed to finish up 1 chapter of Geog and another for Bio. I hate how short my attention span is. I can be sitting in the dining room, the place with the least distractions, and I'll start staring at the ceiling fan rotating above me. Highlight of the day was watching Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, and just like what Vidhya said, "OKAY SO HERE'S THE DEAL FRED AND GEORGE. you come in zooming with your brooms and fireworks during the geog exam. Okay? okay." Haha, can't wait to go for the exhibition with Angela & friends!  

Every single little thing

Haha, I never knew that.
Really love to complain about every single paper that I just took. How is it possible for me to remember every single little detail when I'm revising at home, or on the bus, or the 45 minutes I have every morning in class, but when I read the question, my mind goes blank?
But on the bright side, everything that's been going on in my mind for the past week or so, has finally been sorted out into tiny little folders in my brain.

Things I would/hope to do for this long weekend:

-Watch the 2 latest episodes of HIMYM
-Meet Ching, Kelly, Jane and Justina tomorrow
-Understand Digestion in Humans and Nutrients
-Understand Weather&Climate
-Catch up on some sleep
-Learn how to fold paper cranes (Haha, it's been months since I last tried)

Labour day was well spent. Hardly did any Literature, but watched The Crucible, The Art of Getting By and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, just to get things off my mind.

 I used to be so strong, on the inside. Nothing ever affected me, and I never cared about what people thought about me. Nothing ever bothered me, nothing. Look at me now. So weak and vulnerable. It's already May, and It's been more than a year. This has to stop, right now, or I'll just explode.